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Spiritual Awakening & The Twin Flame Journey


We all have a Twin Flame and we can all be triggered by other means to spiritually awaken.

In this article we look at spiritual awakening in its relation to the Twin Flame journey, but the journey we take as Twins is relevant to all.


When our soul is born, it splits in two, a masculine and feminine energy, this symbol of duality is depicted in all of nature and every major spiritual or religious belief system - light and dark, masculine and feminine, yin and yang….

 Each half of the soul, or each ‘twin’, leads many life times before they meet again. We meet our Twin Flame when we are ready to ascend back to unity. It is a common misconception that ‘unity’ or ‘union’ is a physical occurrence between the twins. True union occurs energetically, when both twins resolve their individual karma and begin healing the remaining shadow aspects of self, so that they can fully embody the light.


When we meet our Twin Flame, the purging process begins. Our twin is a perfect mirror for our deepest, darkest fears. Our experience of them is a direct reflection of how we feel about ourselves inside. On an energetic level, any kind of contact with them dislodges the shadows within us and begin’s pushing them to the surface to be released. This can be an exceptionally painful process, the awakening triggers cause both twins to filter their thoughts and feelings about one another through the many layers of rejection, loss and abandonment trauma within their shadow self, resulting in anxious attachment or detachment. The energy created by this process is like flipping two magnets . As you already know, magnets can either repel or attract one another - the twin with feminine energy (this can be a man or woman) is usually triggered first, her shadow aspects and fears of rejection, loss and abandonment are activated, causing her magnet to flip and the masculine counterpart to be repelled. It is also possible for the masculines energy to become repellent.

Both counterparts, upon meeting and coming into one another’s energetic awareness, begin the process of self realisation. The ego begins to breakdown, each twin begins to awaken. 

 Spiritual awakening represents the lifting of the veil of ignorance, in sanskrit it means ‘incorrect understanding’. Ignorance masks our true nature and keeps us trapped in the dark of lower levels of consciousness. This call to adventure within can initially be terrifying for a person, it requires us to closely examine self, to face our own judgement and pain. The feminine counterpart tends to respond more willingly to this process and surrenders more easily to the call of her soul. But masculine energy is different, it is often more deeply attached to the material world and lower level ego conscious, so it is not uncommon for the masculine counterpart to resist the same soul call. Resistance only creates more pain, the call of the soul persists until it is answered and both twins, when resisting the call to go within and heal self, are triggered relentlessly. Karmic patterns and cycles are presented in every area of the twin’s life for resolution, for some, they may have already experienced a dark night of the soul and be ready for their awakening, for many there is still work to be done, shadows need to be released and karma resolved. 


This ‘runner and chaser’ dynamic exists because of the self love deficit and shadows within both twins energetic field, once these are activated, the twin’s energy will continue to magnetise and repel one another. If you do not love yourself, your twin cannot love you. For they are the other half of your soul and a rejection of self, is a rejection of your twin. To unite the soul, each half must be healed and embodied by the light, though as each twin becomes lighter, the energy between them becomes more magnetic and balanced. Energy does not lie, you cannot ‘fake’ the condition of being in love with self, the magnet will not flip. Most all twins get stuck in a cycle of looking externally to relieve the pain they are feeling internally, they conclude that to be happy again they need their twin either back or gone or some other circumstance to be just right, but every time they try and control their external circumstances to make this so - by chasing or running from their twin, the divine plan reminds us that we cannot control this journey and so eventually, we surrender and it draws us within. This is a perpetual cycle that continues until we finally seek to answer the calling in our soul. 

When twins are in seperation, the triggers to heal self persist, you can run from your twin, but you cannot run from from the higher calling of your soul. The call to return to self.


The term ‘calling of our soul’ is entirely appropriate, our twin is calling us in mind and spirit, yet in our 3D reality a tangible relationship between the twins continues to be madly elusive. This journey leads us to understand that to reconnect with our soul, to answer that calling, we must go, not to our twin, but within. By going within and acknowledging the truth of who we are we access an infinite source of healing, love, joy, peace and abundance. It is for this reason that this journey, whether you have met your Twin Flame or not, is relevant to all.

Surrender and Acceptance is not just a stage of the Twin Flame journey, spiritually speaking, it is a stage of awakening that indicates our WILL to answer the call of spirit and return to ONE. It represents your connection to source energy, life and all that is. Once you reach full surrender, in terms of the Twin Flame journey, you accept all that is and in doing so, in embracing love, you release fear. Surrender in itself is a journey, there are many stages -The lotus flower peels back its petals in perfect divine timing, each time revealing aspects of the shadow self that we can release so that we may allow in more light, the process of coming into full bloom is the most magical and beautiful journey. Some of us may be dragged to this journey of surrender kicking and screaming, through having been triggered by meeting our twin, but many of us experience awakening for other reasons and some of us just simply wish to embrace it or have felt guided or compelled to explore the spiritual self. Whatever your reason for finding your way here, trust that joy, peace, love and abundance awaits you. 


Returning to One

Coming to Union with your TWIN

If you have not met your twin, feel free to skip to Part 2 below

Part 1

Coming into Union with your TWIN


The question I am asked the most is ‘When will/How can I come into Union with my Twin”.

The answer to this is not straightforward.


If you have met your Twin Flame, you are being triggered to reunite both aspects of your soul. That goes without saying. There is certainly some divine plan that drives twins towards union, but the whens and hows of the coming together are not relevant to your journey. That is to say, the whole point of the journey is to surrender to the divine plan. The desire to ‘know’ is in itself a contradiction to surrender, it is born of your ego’s desire to control your external circumstances and get ‘what you want’- your twin. You want the reassurance that you are going to get your TWIN. Knowing is only shared with us by spirit on an ‘as need to know’ basis, we must learn to accept that one does not show up at college, barge forward to the front of the class and demand of the teacher ‘I have not yet completed modules 1,2,3,4,5 or 6 but I want the answer to module 7 right now please’. Your ability to comprehend the totality of the divine plan for your union is simply not engaged when you are at any lesser stage in the journey, you have to trust and have faith that everything will become clear as you go, that spirit is always guiding you in the right direction and in perfect timing. 


To surrender is to accept what is, that you already exist in love, that you alone are enough, this is true union, it begins with self, only when both twins reach this state of unconditional love for self can full soul union take place. Though as you both ascend, physical union becomes more likely. In surrendering, the divine plan is free to unfold at its natural pace, before surrender the twin trapped in the runner/chaser stage is blocking that divine flow of union. Both twins have free will, one counterpart may awaken and surrender to the journey and their souls ascension long before the other. In every instance I have experienced through my channel and client/student base, it is the feminine counterpart that awakens first, she is the torch bearer for the masculine twin, who becomes magnetised by her light and triggered harder to awaken himself. He can resist awakening though, as the feminine will learn for herself, the process of allowing the ego to breakdown and surrendering to spirit is hard and messy, both twins often resist this process for a very long time. To fully heal and resolve our karma we need a degree of self awareness, realisation and judgement, until both twins develop the spiritual and emotional maturity to commit to their own healing and ascension, they will stay stuck in ever repeating cycles of karmic pain, trauma and suffering. For many, ignoring these cycles can trigger a dark night of the soul, which presents as serious depression and anxiety.


The twin that awakens first (typically the feminine), seeks to wake the other twin up. This is usually the point just before surrender, when the awakened twin has realised the power of self healing and self love, but the focus of their journey still exists in duality. Though the awakened twin may be progressing spiritually and beginning to heal self, prior to full surrender their new understanding of what is required to reach union (both twins must heal) triggers the awakened twin to try and heal and guide their counterpart in order to accelerate towards union. Whilst there are many healing modalities available to us externally that can help us move forward on this journey, they will only serve to lift our shadows to the surface, it is the person receiving the healing who must allow the release of their own shadow self and therefore his/her own healing, so there are no treatments, spells or magical healings that can force union to occur. To release shadow self we must first face it with our own judgement and as discussed before, both twins can exert their free will and resist such healing and/or the self reflection that is required for healing to occur. The awakened twin tries for a time to heal the unawakened twin, before realising this truth. 


Thereafter, many ask if they should ever give/send healing to their twin or not and the answer to this question lies in your own higher consciousness. As lightworkers, we do not force healing upon others, we deliver it only to those who seek it from us, except perhaps in exceptional circumstances, where someone needs clearing to ensure their sovereignty or perhaps to give relief during times of extreme suffering or illness. An occasional spiritual health or energy check or clearing on loved ones such as our twin, close friends and family, is acceptable, but it should never be so that it creates co-dependence or interferes unnecessarily. As a lightworker or self love advocate/guide, your role is not to heal, it is to lovingly offer healing and guide those that seek it towards healing self, where true healing and empowerment resides. Once we surrender to self and the journey of awakening, that realisation naturally adjusts our perception regards what healing to offer the unawakened twin. It is natural to want to share your love and healing with all and I encourage you to do so, offering healing remotely will only be received by the energy and higher self of the recipient if their free will allows it, so sending good vibes will never do anyone any harm. However, releasing the need to do this for the unawakened twin is acceptance that this is something that they ultimately must do for themselves. It releases the awakened twin to focus on their own journey.


Once the unawakened twin begins to open up to receive healing and face their shadow self, they may seek it from the awakened twin directly, in those cases, the guidance is still the same, offer what you might for a client or loved one - an occasional clearing, spiritual health check or energy healing boost is acceptable, but we should always be guiding them towards their own self healing practices and not encouraging co-dependence and/or attachment, which in the case of both twins, is exactly what they are trying to heal from.


In summary, if you are still asking the question ‘When will/How can I come into Union with my Twin”, you need to release this, let it go and understand that your power, ascension and true path lies in focussing instead on Part 2, Returning to One, how to come into union with SELF.

Part 2 

Coming into Union with Self

Unconditional love begins with self, you cannot give someone else that which you do not already have. Most all of humans exist in relationships born of conditional love - that is to say that we have expectations of our friends, family and significant partners, limits, boundaries and rules. 


By nature, our parents are supposed to love us “unconditionally” Our parents, even if well adjusted, had two important roles in our childhood. To love us and want us to know that you were loved, no matter what, unconditionally. It’s an important component of being happy.  Except the second role they played in our childhood would interfere with this understanding. Our parents had to prepare us for the real world. They had to teach us to be responsible, respectful, follow the rules of the household so that we would follow the laws of society. All of this is necessary for us to be responsible, take care of ourselves, and others, so that we can have a fulfilling life. This meant that we learned to act upon consequences of punishments and rewards.  In short, we learned conditional love, acceptance, and approval of ourselves in the process. When our parents punished us, we experience of their love was that it was conditional. From this, it is likely our whole experience of love became skewed. Love, acceptance, and approval became something that we had to earn.

Our primary relationships, our first bonds with other humans are based on the patterns we learn from our parents. We learn that they love us, but that included in that relationship that they can also be disappointed, frustrated, annoyed, angry and dismissive of us. Our experience of “love” includes all of these other emotions. The truth is, we are not born into unconditional love, neither were our parents, or their parents, and despite all of our best intentions as parents - very few of us truly understand the meaning of this thing we call “Unconditional love”.

Even with very kind and loving parents, signals were sent about what they approved of and disapproved of. In emotionally volatile households the negative programming was more pronounced. But even in very peaceful and loving households there are typically forms of withdrawal, signals of “lack of acceptance” which the mind will convert to experiences of rejection.

As children, we exist in a theta brainwave state (a highly hypnotic and suggestible brainwave state) until around age 8, our experience of intimate relationships during this time shapes how we respond and react to others, those neural pathways are strong and they conditioned us to measure our worth based on what our parents showed us. The pattern extends over time and we become concerned with what our teachers think of us. We seek approval from other adults, relatives and friends. We seek approval and fear rejection from our peers, family, social group and certainly intimate partners, we do everything we can to seek their approval so we can feel good and loved, so that the rejection circuit in our neural pathway doesn’t fire. Approval or disapproval from others can trigger our internal programming for feeling accepted and approved, or judged, rejected, and not good enough. As adults our programming continues to work on us and our emotions, greatly affecting how we feel about ourselves. It works that way until we confront our own beliefs and programming and change them.

Spiritual Awakening is becoming aware of this reality, it is a journey of understanding love, real love, unconditional love - for self. It is about undoing all of that old programming that taught us that love means acceptance and approval from others. 

Negative programming and the resulting self-love deficit is deeply ingrained in our psyche. We are born pure, but we become a product of our parents, their views, not just on love but in life too and this influence shapes our view of ourselves and love, as does everyone else’s whom we came into contact with in these tender childhood years. Some of us were lucky, our parents developed the right balance of loving and teaching to allow us a great sense of self worth and self acceptance, just the right amount to make us feel whole and balanced, confident in our own self. But truly, how many people do you know who are really like that? For most of us, we are riddled with treacherous insecurity, for the more unfortunate, we are filled with a deep self loathing and painful anxiety about not being lovable or good enough. This is further perpetuated by the media, which sells us images of absolute perfection in human form and we as a society are further degrading our sense of self. The rise of social media only compounds this ego based self loathing further, with the masses reaching out in droves for approval from their peers and really, anyone who will throw them a like or a follow. We were taught that to love ourselves, we must seek the approval of others, be they a stranger, work colleague, friend, lover, sibling, parent or child. This was the greatest lie we were ever fed. 

Enlightenment drives us towards unconditional love of self. It forces us to purge every inner wound, to reprogram our minds, to realise that the only approval that matters if the one from our own inner voice. Considering this, to me, self realisation and spiritual awakening is the greatest journey and purpose of all humanity, it is to return to unity, love, one. 

In learning to love ourselves, we become free to love others in REAL terms, unconditionally. It is my belief that this is how we evolve into greater, more civilised and compassionate human beings. Energetically speaking, quantum physics teaches us that we are just energy, vibrating at different levels - love is the highest vibration of all and the more of us that exist in love, the more loving we become as a collective. It will literally raise the vibration of the planet. 

So, what does loving unconditionally mean in real terms and how do we learn to love ourselves?

Kahlil Gibran described love as such -

“Love gives naught but itself and takes

naught but from itself. Love possesses not nor would it be

possessed; For love is sufficient unto love.”

Love is self fulfilling and it exists within us, we always are, always have been and always will be, connected to love. Unity with self is to have awareness of this infinite flow of love from source, so that we no longer seek it in our external 3D reality. This releases us from the need to attach our need for love and approval on to other people, objects or circumstances in our material world. In releasing ourselves from these bondages, we create a life in which we no longer fear rejection, loss, abandonment or failure, because all of our love and joy comes from within, our peace of mind and state of happiness is not threatened by that which exists externally.

Before we reach a state of unconditional love for self, we experience extreme pain and rejection when others do not fill this hole for us (they never can). For example, occurrences such as a twin ignoring you, a friend harshly rejecting you, a significant loved one betraying you or perhaps an aspect of your material world, such as a career or home life collapses or falls into crisis - this plunges you into misery, your neural pathways connected to rejection, loss, fear and abandonment are fired. All of these external events are things you have no control over and yet they have a dramatic impact on the quality of your life experience.


Loving self unconditionally means taking back control of your life and giving yourself the freedom to enjoy the constancy of peace, happiness, love and abundance and  infinite flow of love inside of you, instead of seeking it externally, where it is unpredictable and unreliable. Loving others unconditionally means giving them the freedom to be themselves and choose their own life path, this comes after unconditional love for self - for it is only in conquering the ego and existing in unconditional love for self, that we can truly let go of the desire to have others meet our needs, expectations and demands to satisfy our need for love and approval. 


As an example, when we are conditionally loving others, we feel rejection, fear, loss, abandonment, pain, anger, frustration and so forth… when they are not behaving as we would wish them to (because we have needs to be met here!). This might mean that they don’t share our own values and beliefs surrounding communication (‘why couldn’t they just text me back, it’s rude not to?”), reciprocation (‘I gave so much to them, they owe me’), confrontation or forgiveness (‘They owe me an apology and I hate how they behaved’) and so on.


When we feel bad because someone ignores us or does not meet our expectations and needs, we are giving our power away. We are not loving self, we are trying to satisfy our need to feel loved by using others as a tap from which we quench our thirst for love. Our parents may have taught us to ‘treat others as you wish to be treated’, but they mostly failed to highlight that others have free will and their own set of beliefs and values according to their own experience, they will behave as they wish - we should lovingly allow them to do so. No amount of loving, giving, manners or strong moral compass on our part is going to ensure that we never encounter otherwise. Furthermore, most of us were not educated in the law of attraction, according to physics, which is that like attracts like or the law of karma (Newton’s law of cause and effect/every action must have a reaction). When we exist in self love, we are able to lovingly observe the lessons (karma) presented for our learning and self realisation because we no longer fear judgement and we are able to lovingly accept others as they are, recognising that it is not our place to judge them, we find no joy in dwelling there or in trying to be accountable, responsible or attached to their journey and experience, be it good or bad. 

Generally speaking, it is much easier to intellectually accept this understanding than it is to fully integrate it so that we actually feel unconditional love for self. It is interesting to note that I grew up surrounded by people, books and teachings that spoke of positive mental attitude, the law of attraction and self love and yet this desirable state of inner peace and joy remained stubbornly out of reach for most of my life. It took a long time for me to find my way to the method of healing and loving self and surrendering to what is, but once I arrived at that path, that elusive and highly desirable state swiftly became my reality.

There is really no need for lengthy programmes, classes, courses or talks - the key can be summarised in just two short paragraphs, thereafter, there exists a great many wonderful teachers and channels of love in this world that your own intuition and higher calling will guide you to, so that you can begin to follow the path of your true soul. I share many links, suggestions and pointers here, but let this just be a beginning and be wary of any practitioner, teacher, lightworker or guru that prays on codependency. When we launch ourselves into our mission work, we will undoubtedly want to learn skills with which to expand our own consciousness and with which to realise our own mission, but healing self and loving self, is an inside job.


The key to your own inner healing is to first harness control of your own mind (mindfulness) by becoming aware of the negative thought forms that exist within your inner dialogue. When you look in the mirror do you think ‘OMG I hate my body/face/life - I am fat/ugly/not good enough/not successful enough/not loveable’?. For most of us this is true in some capacity, for many of us, it’s the whole damn scale. Generally speaking, we do not talk to others this way - we wouldn’t dream of coming face to face with a friend, loved one or even a stranger and saying ‘Wow I hate your body, face, life and you are not good enough at all, you’re ugly too, you’re not successful enough, you’re not loveable’. For most of us, we do hold these judgements and are too polite to speak them, whilst this still shows a degree of compassion for the feelings of others, it still reveals the shadow aspects inside of us. It is not just a twin flame who acts as a mirror, it is all of humanity, we tend to project onto others what we most dislike about ourselves. 


In harnessing power and control over your thoughts, you can begin to instruct your mind and body how to behave, think and feel. It is really that simple. YOU CHOOSE YOUR STATE OF BEING. Your higher self, is more powerful than your conscious and subconscious mind for it exists when the two connect, when you achieve unity of mind (Theta state), your mind and body responds to thoughts at 40 million times the pace. Neuroscience and biology teaches us that when in theta state our thoughts power up action centres in the brain and that from there we can rewire the programming and conditioning of our mind and body in rapid time. We achieve theta state by meditating. 


The key to healing, unconditional love for self and return to one therefore is mindfulness and meditation. One must engage in a disciplined daily practice of both to begin the process of reclaiming the inner voice and rewiring the brain from the point of theta state. Allowing yourself at least 15 minutes, twice a day, to reconnect with your soul and heal, is in itself an act of self love. If you cannot find 30 minutes to focus on you, then you must reconsider your priorities, because nothing is more important than a happy YOU.


When you are happy inside, everything outside works out for your highest good. This is the beautiful gift of awakening, realising that EVERYTHING in you external reality is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. Like attracts like, so when you go about your day from a place of perfect peace, joy, love and trust, you radiate love and light and attract people and circumstances that match your vibration. Just by being, your light heals the world.

I will continue to add guided meditation and mindfulness resources and healing tutorials to my website, channel and groups as I develop this online space. Thank you for sharing your journey with me, please do get in touch if you have any questions.

Much love and light,



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